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by hoodhoranyou



Category: Harry Styles - Fandom, Louis Tomlinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Falling In Love Again, Harry beats himself up a lot, M/M, Niall is a Good Friend, Protective Liam, louis has cancer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-04-26 18:11:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14407665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoodhoranyou/pseuds/hoodhoranyou
Summary: Louis and Harry were good until they weren't. Now, the band is on a hiatus and something bad has happend.





	1. The Break Up

**Author's Note:**

> So, I found this in my drafts and I think it has massive potential. So, here is me starting a new fic before my other one is finished. xx
> 
> Comments and Kudos are much appreciated. :)

Harry rolled over to find the bed empty and the sliding door on the balcony open. Louis was leaning against the railing smoking. Harry sat up on his elbows and tried to memorize every part of the scene playing out in front of him. Louis wearing nothing but a pair of basketball shorts and Harry's boots he had stolen to wear outside for the quick moment. Harry chuckled at the sight but could feel the tears forming in his eyes he rolled back over to face the wall. He clenched the sheets and brought them closer to his neck shielding himself from the cold that was seeping in from the outside.

A few moments later Louis climbed back into bed and pulled Harry into him breathing in his scent his cold body pressed against the younger boys pulling away whatever warmth he had. Harry drew in a deep breath wanting to pause this moment and live in it for a lifetime. How was he ever going to get out of this bed knowing that it was the last time he would ever be able to be with Louis in this way. Knowing that he was about to break his both of their hearts. Simon had said that it was better to end it now before it got way out of hand. Although, he was unaware of the extent of their relationship. He was unaware that they had been together practically since the beginning. Simon was under the impression that Harry and Louis just fucked around and had only been fucking around for a couple months.

Last week Simon had rang Harry practically bursting with anger about the pictures that had just landed on his desk. Apparently someone had sent photographic evidence of their relationship and was threatening to leak it to the media. Of course there was always a possibility of this happening but Louis and Harry had always been careful they had even gone to the extent of bringing in one their close friends Eleanor to act as Louis' girlfriend. They had been careful but even then it didn't stop everything from crumbling down. Simon had ordered Harry to put a stop to "these outrageous antics" and then began to set up a way to bring back around Harry's detested womanizer image. Claiming that it was for the good of the band and all of their futures in the long run.

He rolled over to face the wall and could hear the door slide shut and the clunk of his boots hitting the hotel floor. The bed deeped as Louis slipped under the duvet and gripped Harry’s waste pulling him in. 

Harry squirmed in Louis' arms until he was nose to nose with the one person he knew like the back of his own hand. He could smell the cigarette on Louis' breath and while it wasn't his favorite smell the more he thought about it the more tears began to form. "Love, what's wrong?" Louis thumbed the tear that was rolling down Harry's cheek stopping it in its tracks. "Whatever it is we can work it. We always work it out." Harry focused on Louis' blue eyes and then his nose and then his lips before drawing him in for a kiss. For a goodbye kiss. He forced his way out of Louis' arms and sat up. Louis was staring at him with trying to hide his faint heartbreak with a puzzled look. "Harry?"

"Lou...Louis we can't do this anymore. It's not...it's not real we aren't going to get anywhere with this...this relationship...it's not working." Harry had rehearsed what he wanted to say hundreds of times over the last week. Every word that he spoke crushed his heart a little more than the last. Louis was staring at him with cloudy eyes and Harry had to turn away to prevent himself from taking it all back and telling him that it was all a lie. Because it was. It was all a lie but it was already out there and it couldn't be taken back. Harry crawled out of bed taking the sheet with him as if to hide the fact that they had spent the entire night before this reminding each other over and over again how much they were in love. He located all of his clothing and went into the bathroom to change.

When Harry came out of the bathroom he glanced towards the bed but Louis had disappeared back to the balcony lighting what Harry knew would be the first of many cigarettes. Because he knew Louis and he knew that when he was stressed or sad or bored he would chain smoke his life away. Harry lost it allowing the tears to start freely falling knowing that it was his fault knowing that he was the one who had caused this perfect human to break. Even Simon's promise to protect Louis and the rest of the boys couldn't calm him down. But he had to straighten up and put on some sort of face in order to entire the hallway filled with security and various members of the bands team.

He smeared away the last of the tears with the back of his hand and turned towards the door refusing to give Louis another glance. He gripped the handle of the door and took a deep breath before letting his curiosity get the best him he yanked the door open. The hall was surprisingly quiet but then again the rest of the boys were probably getting ready for the interview they had later in the day. All Harry wanted to do was crawl into bed and never get back up but the show must go on. Harry put his head down and tried to avoid making eye contact with the people wandering the halls. Which turned out to be ineffective smacking right into the back of Niall. 

"Oi...that hur...H what's wrong mate you look like you haven't slept in weeks?" Niall was always the one to keep everyone laughing and smiling but right then he was staring at Harry with a confused look as if he was trying to read his mind. He turned to the group of people he had been chatting with and politely excused himself. Turning back to Harry he motioned for him to follow him down the hall to his room. 

Niall was sharing a room with Liam but it didn't appear that he was around. He was probably off dealing with some business that no one else wanted to deal with. Harry lingered in the doorway while Niall busied himself making them tea. "H?" Harry looked at Niall and then at the ground Zayn was the only person aware of Louis and Harry's relationship and it should really stay that way but Harry needed someone to listen. He knew that Zayn would be the first person Louis would run to and they couldn't both burden him with their heart break. "Harry I know...we all know...shit it's hard not to know when we are around you guys twenty-four-seven. I'm sure whatever you fought about isn't that big of deal you'll both get over it and carry on as usual. He loves you and it's not hard to tell that you love him." Harry lost it. 

When he was final able to calm down and breath without crying he was sat next to Niall who was rubbing circles in the small of his back. "It's my...fault Ni. We got caught and Simon said..."  
"Simon what the fuck did I expect of course he has something to do with this. Sometimes I wish I could just tell him to fuck right off." 

"No. He's right it's not good for the band it's not right for you guys to have to deal with the possibility of Lou and I getting caught." He took in a deep breath and chewed on the corner of his lip. "I told him that our relationship wasn't going anywhere I told him it wasn't real. God, it was so fucking real but I couldn't bare the possibility of hurting him or anyone else." Niall was staring at him opening and closing his mouth several times trying to formulate a sentence. "You don't have to say anything it is what it is. I'm doing this to protect everyone and if that means breaking my heart than it's worth it."

"That's the thing H...you didn't just break your own heart."Harry buried his face in the palm of his hands.

"I know that but Louis will get over it he will meet someone that can be with him and not ruin his life in the process." He got up and made his way towards the door. "I need to get ready.” With that he pulled the door open.

The hallway was busier than before with multiple people running about. Charlotte appeared beside Harry tapping frantically on her phone. "Love, have you spoken to Louis he won't open his door and I really don't wanna have to get the front desk to give me the extra key. Every time I or anyone else tells him it's almost call time he tells us to "fuck off" is there anything you can do?" Harry wordlessly handed her the room key that he had left in his pants pocket and continued down the hall. When he reached the elevator he jammed his thumb on the down button and waited the agonizing few seconds for the elevator to open. 

"Hey, hold the elevator." A hand reached into the elevator preventing it from closing and Charlotte entered with some of the other crew and a hooded figure. Harry avoided looking at him already knowing it was Louis. Louis positioned himself into the corner of the elevator trying to make himself invisible. Harry couldn't help himself and stole a glance at him. He was wearing a black hoodie with the hood up. It was Harry’s so it’s too big for him and sunglasses probably to hide his bloodshot eyes. Harry felt sick. A twenty second elevator ride felt like years. When the door opened Harry couldn't make his exit fast enough. "Harry, I need you and Louis to go sit over there and wait I am going to go round up the rest of the boys the van is leaving in five minutes."

Harry slumped down into the couch that she had pointed at and watched as Louis stood staring out into to space avoiding Harry. Of course he would avoid Harry. Harry wanted to avoid Harry. "You know..." Harry jumped at the sound of Louis' voice. "it's pretty fucking hilarious how I spent everyday afraid that I was going to hurt you...yet you were the one who ended it...and i'm the one that's a blubbering fucking mess." Louis turned and walked towards the rest of the band who had just exited the elevator.


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is another short update but I am finishing term this week and I have the whole story pretty much mapped in my head just gotta get it out on paper. I never intended to make this story a sad one but it happened. I cannot stress enough that the ending will not leave you heartbroken or will it?

Harry tugs his hair up into a knot and places his headphones over his ears trying to drown out the busy airport. This was his third plane trip in the past four days and he was exhausted. At least this time he would be heading home. Home to his family. Even if it was for just a haircut and a moment to breath.

 

The band had decided a few months prior to take a break from making music together and do there own thing. Harry was relieved because while he loved the band it was becoming more painful each day. When you’re in love with someone who no longer acknowledges your existence being in the same room as them can be heart wrenching.

 

It wasn't that things weren't going well it was that they hadn't had a break since the band was formed. With Zayn leaving last year everyone was just ex hausted and some time to themselves was much needed.

 

A man approached Harry and motioned for him to follow. This was how Harry had been safely boarding planes for the last five years. Using different routes and back rooms to get from one area to another. It wasn't the best situation but at least he could say he had seen more back rooms in airports than any normal human should.

 

The first class seats reclined out to form a bed but he could never seem to sleep. Especially, on plane rides that would carry him in the opposite direction of Louis. Niall was good about letting Harry know what was happening in Louis’ life especially since the older man quit speaking to him long ago.

 

He powered his phone off and grabbed his journal from his carry on bag before storing it in the overhead compartment.

 

***

 

“Bloody hell, Harry if you don’t answer the phone.” Niall pressed the red end call button with far too much force and continued pacing his living room. He pressed redial and listened to the phone ring again before it went to voicemail. 

 

“Love, you know he’s on a flight back to London. In fact he should be landing any moment just give him time.” Alice stood from the couch and walked over to him pulling the phone from his hand and tossing it onto the couch. “I know you are worried about Louis but don’t you think bringing Harry into this will stress him even more?”

 

“They need eachother Al. No matter how many times they deny it they do. I am constantly telling each of them what the other is doing. Both of them are under some stupid impression that the other no longer cares.” He takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of him nose. “He might say otherwise but Louis’ gonna need him for this.” 

 

His phone buzzes on the couch and he practically dives for it. Foregoing checking who was calling for just answering. “Hello!?” 

 

“Hey Ni, are we still planning to drive out and see Louis tomorrow?” Liam’s exhausted voice filled the silence.

 

“I’m trying to get a hold of Harry.” He sits on the couch sinking in as far as the cushions will allow. His phone beeps signaling he’s receiving another call and hangs up on Liam without another word. It’s his mum who he loves but promptly ignores in favor of waiting to see if Harry will call back.

 

***

 

Harry had turned his phone on and chucked it back in his bag so he could go through security. When he pulled it out in his car he had fifteen missed messages from Niall and several texts from friends. He put his phone on the dash to dig for something in his back when it rang nearly falling to the ground. Niall’s photo lit up the screen. He clicked the green button and pressed speaker.

 

“Harry, I have been calling you all morning.” 

 

Harry rolled his eyes despite the other man not being able to see him. “You knew I was flying in from LA, Alice knew I was flying in from LA, hell the bloody paparazzi knew I was flying in from LA. I’m meant to meet someone to get my haircut do you want to meet for dinner before I drive up see my mum?”

 

Niall had grown quiet during his rant. “Harry.”

 

“What?” Harry had pulled out into the London traffic.

 

“Louis’ sick.” Niall held his breath waiting for a response.

 

“What’s he got like a head cold or somethin. I hardly see how that applies to me.” The words are leaving his mouth but something deep in the pit of his stomach knew. Knew that Niall wouldn’t call him sixteen times over a head cold. 

 

“Harry, now you and I both know I wouldn’t…”

 

“Listen, Niall I’ve gotta go i’ll call you later.” He was now sitting in the fairly empty parking lot of the salon. He didn’t want to hear it. He knows he was harsh. He knows he should be rushing to Louis but he can’t especially if his suspicions are right. 

 

***

 

Louis hates hospitals this was the fourth one he had been in since October and it’s January. He had been really good at keep his health a secret up until the band took a break. You would think it would have been the other way around. 

 

Osteosarcoma it was in his right leg a leg he would have to have removed. First, he will start chemotherapy and then they will take his leg. Followed by more chemotherapy if necessary.  

 

Niall found out first and cried. He had never really seen him cry before but that was happening a lot lately. People crying around him. 

 

This hospital visit was only to meet with doctors to set up a treatment plan. The doctor was talking to his mum more then him so he had tuned them both out. Tired of hearing cancer this and cancer that. 

 

Liam found out almost immediately after Niall because the other boy had insisted he needed to know. “You’re gonna need a support system Louis and we’ve always been each other's support systems.” 

 

He assumes Harry knows because Niall’s gotta a big mouth and it’s not like Louis would tell him. He’d sooner let someone like the Sun inform Harry then speak to him again. 

 

The doctor finishes droning on and he stands and Louis shakes his hand and is out the door faster than he should’ve. He stops a little ways down the hall to catch his breath and let the pain in his knee subside. 

 

His mum caught up to him and gripped his shoulder forcing him to sit. “Boo, you’ve got to slow down. I know you’re used to running around stages and singing to sold out crowds but you’ve got to take care of yourself and that means slowing down.” 

 

“But i’m not seventy-five mum,” he huffs.

 

“Yes, but you are sick Louis and not just with a cold. Not this time.” She had taken the seat next to him and was running her hands through his fringe. He was crying he doesn’t even know when the tears had formed but now they wouldn’t stop. They were rolling down his check in wet, hot, silent drops. 

 

The car ride home was silent except for the faint sounds of the car radio and the occasional ticking of the turn signal. The driveway to his mums house was long which helped it stay hidden from spectators.

 

The front porch was white and held two rocking chairs and a table. Yet, Harry was sat on the front steps hand tugging his hair that was shorter than Louis could have ever recalled. His eyes were rimmed red and his cheeks were puffy. 


End file.
